Yesterday, I received a gift in the mail from a friend of mine. She said that she saw the owl necklace and thought of me. That’s why she picked it up. That’s why she sent it to me.
I’m touched. People don’t really do that for me. Certainly, some people who listen to me do give me gifts based on what they know about me. This is great. There are some people who give generic gifts that they buy for all their friends. This is not so great. I can feel the impersonalness of the item. I know that it’s just a gift for the sake of giving a gift. This is not the worst crime of gift-giving. The worst is when someone regifts the item you gave to that person.
Granted, it is fabulous to receive something that is actually intended for you.
That’s not what makes this particular gift so special. What makes this gift special is that my friend took the time out to synthesize my interests and characteristics. From there, she found an item that best represents me. In her synthesis, the discovered something that I did not know about myself. I would never associate a symbol of wisdom to my personhood, particularly at such a young age (Plutarch rules). For someone to see something about me that I don’t always see or am not aware of is the greatest gift. She gave me something that opened the way into my own awareness of self. And this awareness of self gives me the responsibility to take care in what I say in do. When I do this, when I know this, I am free. My friend gave me a little trinket that gave me a different way into my own freedom. And for that, I am truly grateful.
Wishing you happiness and the struggle.
A friend of mine told me that she saw this necklace and thought of me. She said I had to have it because the owl represents wisdom. She associates this quality with me. <3 Thank you so much!
I’ve been growing a lot lately. It’s not just maturing (I’m turning 21 in 11 days!) as an individual, but also, I am growing as a writer and a performer.
I am becoming more responsible as a young person. I am beginning to take more responsibility for my actions. Normally, I try to brush things under the carpet once I am caught making a mistake. Now, I realize that I need to state that I have made a mistake and not make any excuses. I used to make excuses when things went wrong. It always was for some similar reason. If I had only spoken sooner, there would be no trouble. I am learning that I need to leave no stone unturned in my pursuit of best course of action.
And I am learning that I need to pursue things as soon as I see them go wrong. Normally, I would just put things off and wait. I hope that the person remembers me and remembers the task I asked. Now I am learning to not wait for the person to take on the task. I need to remind that person more. I need to…get on that person’s case. I would prefer to treat people like they are all capable of doing things in a timely manner, but the truth is that they are not. And instead of begrudging them for what they do not do, I need to get on them so they will do. Nothing is more motivating (okay, maybe fear is) than an annoyance.
As a writer, I have been sending out short stories and poems for publication. So far, I have a poem ‘Face Creams’ that will be published in Blackberry: A Magazine. I also sent out a few short stories. One person wrote back to me that she hated my story, nothing was interesting about it, and that it needed more character development. My initial response was of shock and anger. I could not believe that she could not see my subtle symbolism (which I was quite proud of myself for being able to pull off–normally I am as subtle as an elephant dancing ballet…). But then after a month of cooling off, I realized that maybe I could do a little more in the character development section. So I acquired a book, whose title now escapes me, about character development and I am pleased I took the chance. The way the book is written is that it is intelligent (I see T/F tables everywhere. YAY LOGIC! <3 ) and it explores character definitions in such a way that I am actually growing as a writer. I am impressed with what I can now start doing.
As a musician, I am a beginner at piano, but thanks to my ah-mazing metronome, I am becoming so much more technical in my playing. This is transferring into my singing. Not only am I able to hear the notes better, but I am more accurate with my singing. It is coming along nicely.
In what ways have you grown since January?
I’ve been thinking a bit lately about how exactly we define life. Some people seem to think that it’s about pleasure, things that make one most happy. But this strikes me as odd, if I make that value judgement that pleasure is the greatest good, then I relinquish the right to call thievery, rape, beatings, and murder wrong. Since they all can give one pleasure.
It caused me to wonder how does one define life? I figure that life is not just about having a good time, but what about when someone is having a bad time? Because life isn’t always blue skies and sunshine. What gets one through those days? It needs to be something more, more than just a pleasure will…it is a will that stands longer and deeper than those days…
So perhaps what we should look for to define life should not be what we would live for, but what we would die for. What would you die for and plan to live your life accordingly…